


But We Said No Homo

by CoffeeAndTae



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Crack, M/M, utter crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-08
Updated: 2015-06-08
Packaged: 2018-04-03 10:33:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4097704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoffeeAndTae/pseuds/CoffeeAndTae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shuuneki shenanigans. Crack.</p>
            </blockquote>





	But We Said No Homo

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry.

“Kaneki, my sweet, allow me to sample your, how you say, fine ass.” Tsukiyama purrs, batting his eyelashes as he drags his index finger along Kaneki’s skin.

“Stop saying ‘how you say’ before shit you clearly know how to say.” Kaneki replies with a mega eyeroll.

“That’s not very kawaii of you, I’m going to have to teach you some manners.”

Tsukiyama’s spiral ass kagune comes out and he rips Kaneki’s clothes at the seams.

“It’s all ogre now,” he whispers. “We shall have, how you say, menage a trois.”

“THAT’S A FUCKING FRENCH WORD, YOU LITTLE BITCH.” Kaneki shrieks as Tsukiyama sucks him off. 

Saliva drips from Tsukiyama’s mouth all over Kaneki’s cock. He takes him all the way to the back of his throat, nose hitting the unruly mess of dark hair at Kaneki’s base.

“I like you better when your mouth’s full,” Kaneki breathes, fisting his hands into Tsukiyama’s purple locks. “I’ll really like it when you’re fucking choking on it.”

“Mgjsaweh,” Tsukiyama says, though his words are impeded by Kaneki’s cock. 

Kaneki pushes him off.

“I need your baguette,” He proclaims, and makes a show of bending over the bed, sticking his ass as high in the air as it can go. 

“Dick bigger than a tower, I ain’t talking about eiffels.” Tsukiyama promises.

He positions himself behind Kaneki and thrusts in harder than he can take. Kaneki’s eyes water as Tsukiyama’s cock digs deep into him, and it’s painful. Still, he pushes his ass back, trying to get him deeper. Tsukiyama laughs a, “Hon, hon,” before pulling out and ramming back in. Their skin slaps together lewdly, the wet sounds filling the room. It’s only coupled with their cries of each other’s name and Tsukiyama trying to speak some shitty for of Italian or something, idfk.

Kaneki’s ass his bright red, and his legs quake with every thrust. Tsukiyama reaches around Kaneki to close his hand around his shaft. His tip is leaking precome, and it makes it easier for his hand to slide up and down with ease. Tsukiayama lifts his head to the sky and cries out,

“TRES BIEN!” 

He comes into Kaneki’s ass, and is delighted to find that Kaneki has also found release. He pulls back and takes a moment to admire the copious amounts of body fluid leaking from Kaneki’s abused hole. They both collapse onto the bed, and Tsukiyama stares at Kaneki lovingly and creepily, but mostly lovingly.

“That was very kawaii of you,” he purrs into Kaneki’s ear. “You’re the best boyfriend ever.”

Kaneki’s eyes widen.

“But we said no homo.”

“I lied.”


End file.
